Divorce is a giant rogue wave sufficient to rend asunder, without warning, half a lifetime's worth of promised hopes and dreams.
Divorce is a muddled muttered mantra of repeated regret.
Divorce is a long lonely road to nowhere, inevitably heading somewhere, albeit only god-knows-where.
Divorce is an explosion of great magnitude resulting in the complete and singular destruction of all-things, leaving behind charred scattered remnants and thoroughly annihilated particles.*
I conferred what feels as if it could be one of the last physical reminders (that and this apparently indelible and resistant-to-all-lasers ring-finger-tattoo on my left hand) of my now defunct 28-year marriage to the good folks at the bike shop this week.
Painted for us on commission by my best pal “Lyle” Motley about 25 years ago, I can no longer get my head around displaying it on the walls of my home ever again. Thus, it has been in a closet since January until this week.
Lyle said, “I get it. I’d probably do the same thing,” when I told him about the painting’s new status some six months ago.
From now on this painting will hang next to a couple of Lyle’s other fantastical and amazing paintings, way up high on the walls of the shop, above the service department. I’ll see it every shift, whenever I work. But it won’t trouble me. Because it never did… I do not hate this painting in any way, in fact I still think it's awesome. I only hated the part where it was in a closet where no one would ever see it and be able to admire it ever again.
That concern was resolved this week. And I could not be happier about it.
A divorced friend recently said to me, “Wouldn’t it be great if, one of these days, we got to a point where we were able to look back on all this tragedy and sadness, and also to where (and likewise perhaps to whom) it has led us, and be able to say “It was all fucking worth it”? Wouldn’t that be the best thing ever?”
I had to agree that it would, that that would definitely be the best thing ever.
* These particles, it is hoped, will, if given enough time, one day coalesce into some new format, fused under duress into a thing radically regenerated and fundamentally evolved.
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